A “No” Can Set You Free

I have been a quiet person all along. But some experiences in life have taught me, that sometimes staying quiet does more harm to you when all it takes is a firm no. When you make your stand clear, the other person can’t force you into something you don’t like. (I am not talking of extreme circumstances)

When I was going to school, there used to be a 10 minute walk from the bus stop to my house. Ah!! The walking part was alright, but road side Romeos were a-plenty.

One person followed me on his cycle and told me that he “liked” me. It scared the daylights out of me! 😰I didnt utter a word, just walked my way. 😑 Every day I dreaded walking the way. Because this person continued following me every day. I contemplated telling my parents, and maybe that would have solved the problem easily, but I didnt want to worry anyone else with my problems. Maybe he wanted an answer, and all that I needed to do was to look him in the face and say, “Look I am not interested. Stop following me.” 😤 I assumed that ignoring him would solve my problem. The answer would be clear to him. It didn’t work that way, it only prolonged my suffering. This continued for quite a while, but finally he must have got the message and stopped following. 

So when the next person popped up telling me that he “liked” me, I decided that I wasn’t going through this prolonged torture any more.  👿 I just told me that I don’t like you, and I never saw him again after that. 😅

And then there are those guys who take joy in making loud comments. There was a small group of guys who would walk behind me passing comments. I ignored them for a few days and then when the problem wasn’t getting any better, I stopped, turned around and asked them, “Don’t you have any other better work to do?” That didnt completely stop them completely , but at least they stopped following me and they whispered a comment or two. 

Then there are those people who think that groping at women when they get a chance is their right. Once I had bunked class to watch a movie with my best friend, and as we were watching the movie, some boys sitting behind us, started groping us from the back. Being a medical student, I always carried a torch with me. I just took out my torch and shining on them, told them, take off your hands. They hadn’t expected it. They didn’t trouble us after that…

Sometimes all it takes is to raise your voice and say “No..I won’t take it!!”. Sometimes people mistake tolerance for acceptance. Sometimes people don’t realise that what they do for fun is hurting you. And unless you make your stand clear, the other person won’t understand it. Though we expect everyone to understand our feelings, most people can’t read other peoples’ mind. So when something is happening to you, which you don’t like, raise your voice ✋ open up and say that you don’t like it. That will set you free.🕊️