A Novice S Sadhna

The ancient science of mantras was purchased( could never read beyond 2 chapters ,too high for my intellect)by me aswell the Gayatri sadhna camp( never even tried to think of doing Gayatri sadhna)attended by me just to see and hear Swamiji, his announcement of Soorya sadhna 2 years back and our lineage doing it and he recommending it to initiates made me  have the courage to do this sadhna of 30 days in 2019, I don’t remember how skeptical I was doing it in 2020 lock down period but 2021 October 18 to November 16 when this Sadhna was to happen, I tried to avoid it as much and seek approval from other co devotees , so I  talked to one householder professional co devotee who is not in India and took all justification on why we don’t need sadhna and grahast itself is a sadhna  then I talked to one of my twin soul baby lover of Swamiji who is as sleep  junk food and talk lover as me and both of us contemplated even a day before sadhna that Swamiji will still keep loving us if we don’t do any mantra Jaap or get up before sunrise aswell weather we had turmeric which was fresh or should we get it from spice box of daily use! I inspired 2 men devotees too to start sadhna assuring they can resleep 3 hours after 10 minutes maala of 108 beads( both started but couldn’t complete). For me to first hold rudraksh bead Mala in hand ,I never knew we shouldn’t use index finger in Japp aswell about Sumerru bead( from where we start) ,so I kept seeing how much beads were left while japping too With mind only seeing clock that just 8 minutes left to sleep again! In between saadhna came karwa chauth, bhaiya dooj ,Diwali, a 4 day out of station wedding ,a 3 day non talking angry moment with a close member of family ,still I kept my promise of getting up at 5.30 am ,getting a warm bath ,wearing fresh red clothes ,lighting a lamp ,drinking 3 sips of little water taking Swamiji s name from 1 of the copper pots ,sprinkling it thrice around me with his name for purification, doing audio assisted 8 minutes 108 bead japp of  Soorya sadhna,blowing the last mantra on first pot and drinking  it ,in second pot putting a pinch of turmeric and putting it on Tulsi Maa in balcony at times at 11pm too .All getting up and sadhna took 2 hours from 5.30 to 7.30 am in between which I cooked porridge for inlaws too and drank my 1 litter aelocvera juice enriched hot water ,and then I slept till 9.30 am again with Swamiji s soothing voice in black lotus yog nidra! Thankfully on last day of sadhna I could visit Sai Baba temple which has shivling and complete my third Soorya saadhna…all glories to Swamiji. SWAMIJI your lazy girl could neither do black lotus during sadhna period for 30 days aswell was disoriented due to re sleeping aswell the 5 minutes manipur Chakra dhyan at night I could never feel any thing with kids and elderly of house busy in I pads ,mobile and t.v aswell my own mental chattering! I kept waiting too for Swamiji to write or say something on not doing sadhna this time for my laziness and craziness but his gentle guidance and grace made an ignorant like me too say Yes Swamiji we did our third Soorya sadhna successfully.