Contributing to Sadhana

When I read Swamiji’s post on 15th January, I felt excited as the day of unveiling of “Sadhana” is fast approaching, but at the same time, I felt pained too. Our petty human mind is deeply conditioned to look for something to worry about. Like the tongue always finds its way to the food stuck in between the teeth, my mind was finding its way into a confusion. Swamiji out of infinite compassion has made the app free, and has at the same time welcomed us to make our contribution voluntarily.

Now, I am a working woman, who has a sufficiently comfortable regular income. Same with my husband. But when it comes to financial matters, I am a scatter-brain, so I have never attempted to manage my finances. (it’s a very poor and unforgivable excuse, but it’s the harsh truth). Our income goes into a joint account, and I always spend only with my husband’s knowledge and consent.

While to me, contributing to Swamiji’s cause is a privilege, it is not so for my husband, who isn’t so much into spirituality as me. He is a kind hearted and generous person, but his way of contributing is very different from mine. And I have long given up trying to make him see things from my point of view. Actually he is right from his own view point. 

So making a contribution meant getting permission from him, not that he would refuse, but it has always been difficult for me to ask anybody for anything. While we so happily spend money for our own petty needs, why does the mind make such a fuss when it comes to giving something to someone else? So I kept tossing and turning the matter in my mind, about how I would go about it. My conscience would never allow me to use the app if I couldn’t do at least a teeny weeny little bit when Swamiji has put in so much hard work into it. So today I decided to make the appeal anyway. Of course, the appeal got accepted, and I made a meagre contribution.

When Lord Rama set out for Lanka, and everyone made whatever contribution they could in building the bridge, it was Lord’s compassion which allowed them all to participate. If Lord Rama had willed it, he could have done it without anyone’s help. But the joy which comes in contributing to a divine cause is something unparalleled. 

I am reminded of the beautiful lines by Tagore, which Swamiji read out to us in his online satang.

I had gone a-begging from door to door in the village path, when thy golden chariot appeared in the distance like a gorgeous dream and I wondered who was this King of all kings!

My hopes rose high and me thought my evil days were at an end, and I stood waiting for alms to be given unasked and for wealth scattered on all sides in the dust.

The chariot stopped where I stood. Thy glance fell on me and thou camest down with a smile. I felt that the luck of my life had come at last. Then of a sudden thou didst hold out thy right hand and say “What hast thou to give to me?”

Ah, what a kingly jest was it to open thy palm to a beggar to beg! I was confused and stood undecided, and then from my wallet I slowly took out the least little grain of corn and gave it to thee. 

But how great my surprise when at the day’s end I emptied my bag on the floor to find a least little gram of gold among the poor heap. I bitterly wept and wished that I had had the heart to give thee my all”

My Bhagwaan…. I realise that my contribution is of no significance in reality. By asking this beggar to give, It is your infinite kindness, that you are allowing me to be a participant in a wonderful cause. And this gift that you are offering to me is far far more precious than what this beggar deserves to recieve. My humble pranaams to your Lotus feet…🙏🙏🙏