Death

      Three deaths.

      A post graduate student in Paediatrics met with a fatal road traffic accident a couple of days ago. The sole earning member of his family consisting of him, his sister and his mother. He was taking a friend to visit her brother when this happened. He died, she survived. 

      A young under graduate student of medicine threw herself from the tenth floor. She could not handle the stress of the final exam, is what we could infer. But to me the sheer violence of her death was shocking. 

      A young man who was like a son to me. Very fit and spiritually very evolved. An avid cricketer, power lifter, yoga practitioner, meditator and a Pranic healer. He died one night in front of his young wife ostensibly of a heart attack. 

      An accident, a suicide and an unexpected death. All of them snatched away at a very young age. All untimely.

      In the first instance, I wondered what had prompted this young girl to carry out this very impulsive act? She had got ready for the exam and on an impulse jumped with her back pack on her shoulder. In another moment she would have probably left for the exam.

      In the second, somehow the divine plan did strike me as very “random.” A gentle, soft spoken young man with a disproportionate degree of misfortune. It must have been one of the many trivial decisions we make on a daily basis – his offering a ride to a colleague. A sobbing nurse said to me that he was a very collected person who would calm her down whenever the tensions of the job would overwhelm her. His father had passed a few years ago in another senseless accident.

      In the third instance, the young man’s wife (a very evolved soul herself), realizing that he was having a heart attack, tried to revive him by cleaning his “anahata chakra” but she experienced a definite push back as though some force was stopping her. None of her Pranic healing friends, whom she’d called in desperation, could carry out any healing for the young man. It was as though the universe did not want him to stay on the Earth anymore.

      The young wife, who is like my daughter, later narrated the whole story to me and I remember getting goose bumps. She remembered one thing very vividly. After his passing his face was wearing the most beautiful smile and was so serene and peaceful that she could not cry. She was filled with wonder and peace.

      Soon after his death, the young man “visited” his wife during her meditation and told her that he had been called back for further purification. He had been chosen for a higher purpose by the great masters.

      At every death I remember the beautiful words penned by the Tamil poet, Kannadasan. The poem evocatively states the limits of all relationships and their transientness. The Tamil words are poignant and English does not seem to do the poem much justice.

      veedu varai uravu,

      veedhi varai manaivi,

      kaadu varai pillai,

      kadasi varai yaaro.

      (When you are gone) Your relatives come till the house,

      Your wife comes till the street,

      Your son comes till the graveyard,

      Who is it that comes with you till the end?

      Yesterday as I stood watching the inanimate body of my young student I was overcome by emotion. I wished there would be someone accompanying him on his journey to the hereafter. I would like to believe that there was.

      I often sit and wonder as to whether the “souls” have an easy transition or not. Especially the ones who have a violent death. Since I care for children I constantly wonder whether they, being very young, feel scared during the transition then I pull myself up and tell myself that the soul is ageless.

      I remember a young Nepalese boy with a rare cancer who was not doing well despite chemotherapy and was being palliated. All of us were saddened as the little one was barely out of infancy and was surely going to pass on soon. One day I suddenly decided to call my friend who is a Paediatric oncologist for a second opinion. She took a look at his case details and told me that she wanted to try an experimental drug. I was ready for anything as were the parents.

      The little boy not only recovered completely (and to my mind – miraculously), he is now a healthy child, full of life. He had literally been snatched back from the clutches of Yama, the God of Death. For every such child though, there are many who do not make it. It does seem unfair that the life span of children with cancer be gauged in terms of five-year survival.

      As a doctor and a Paediatrician death is a constant companion (actually this is a truth for all of us!). There are many situations wherein we encounter death. Children who come with critical ailments, children whose parents seek medical attention late, children with cancers, children in whom we are unable to pick up the diagnosis on time and those in whom we inadvertently make errors of omission or commission. We are dealing with “untimely” deaths all the time whether it is in the newborn period or anytime thereafter.

      Gurudev says in his video on death that “we call a death untimely if anyone we love dies earlier than expected. He says all deaths are natural. There are no untimely deaths. Some deaths are harder to accept. If it is “untimely” then we keep looking for answers.”

      Each soul has a journey to complete on this planet, he says. Even if someone takes their own life it is just an illusion because it was supposed to happen that way. Even if someone takes their own life it is not an untimely death. It is of course very painful to see someone leave the world much earlier than the time frame within which the world is operating.

      We have equated the term natural with normal which may not always be the case. An early call is not such a bad thing. He says anything spiritual is supposed to set you free and not make you fearful. Be fearless, be prepared for death. Why be fearful in anticipation? Such compelling words from our master!

      We do not know in advance the exact time of our death or under what guise our death will come. This depends on circumstances beyond our control anyway, and knowing or not knowing about it cannot alter, in any way, what is to take place.

      What is within our control is how we face our mortality whenever it chooses to come. Our mental preparation, attitude and the way we have lived our life are the key factors that decide how we will encounter death. While we cannot choose the external manner of our death, we can definitely choose how we are going to face this great event. The good news is that we do therefore have some choice in the matter.

      As Sadhguru Jaggi Vasudev says, “Death is something that happens only once in our lives. It is important that we conduct it well.” A sacred ritual, it seems. Akin to the other rituals we practice.

      Death is our constant companion, and it is death that gives each person’s life its true meaning (Paulo Coelho)!

      To be continued… 

      My pranams at the lotus feet of Gurudev 🙏.