I Said OK

This is a small story, story of my friend and me. I have known this friend, my dear buddy, for 25 years. Yes, our friendship goes that long. But like all friendship,we have had our ups and downs, periods of aloofness and also days on unforgettable companionship and bonding. But as life grows, so also grows some misunderstandings. And if we give light to such misunderstandings, they can turn into an inferno and burn everything down. However, if you ignore it, sooner or later, a strong wind will blow that spark of doubt away, and peace will be restored. All that you need is Hope.

So I was travelling to the US, and my friend wanted me to visit his town just to visit him. It was a town in middle of nowhere, not likely to ever feature in my travel destination for any other reason except to meet my friend. My friend kept telling me how other people would ignore his request for the same reason – no one comes to my gaon, he said.

In fact, we first discussed if he would come and meet me in Miami and then I would go and meet him.I even provisioned for 2 ‘nothing’ days in Miami, assuming he would be joining me there. 

But then he informed me after a week and said it’s best that I only come and he will not be flying down. I said OK.

I booked my flight tickets from Miami to visit him. I was going to stay for two days.

Then two weeks before I was to travel to US, I informed him about the specific dates I would be in Miami and when I would visit him.

Then a week before I was to travel to US, he messaged to ask him specific days I would be coming; I told him 24/25th. He said,”oh, that’s week day; sorry, I will not be able to come to pick you up. You will need to Uber”. I said OK.

(now, here, a series of thoughts went through my mind. Kya yaar, do you want me to come? I am coming, and you cannot even take time to pick me up? Then you will be at work all day as they are working days? I have booked non cancellable tickets, but I guess it’s OK to bear the loss.)

(It’s important to note that only the ones we love, whose relationship we really care, are the ones who hurt us. Not because we allow them to hurt us. We set EXPECTATIONS from them. We do not realise that they have a mind of their own and work based on what THEY think is right and not what is right for us. That’s what was happening here.)

Anyways, what surprised me the most was that he said he would not be able to pick me up, even without asking the time of my flight arrival.

He messaged the next hour and asked me for my flight itinerary. I shared the same. I was landing 11:30am on Tuesday.

“Oh man, that’s a really bad time”, he said. “I have a call at 12 noon, which I cannot change in anyway. Drive from my home to airport is 45 mins. Sorry, man, you will have to Uber”. I said OK.

Then a day before I was to fly, he messaged me and said. “Brother, it will cost you $45 minimum for the Uber to my house. Why spend that much money. Why don’t you wait at the airport only. I will finish my call and pick you up. It would mean about an hour long wait, but I recommend you do that.” I said OK.

(till this time, I had not configured the cost of the Uber drive. I was just annoyed about the fact that I would need to come home on my own.)

Then guess what happens on the morning of the flight? I message him after checking in for my flight, and he replies. “Buddy, my meeting is cancelled, and I will be there on time to pick you up. I have identified a nice fine dining restaurant where we will go straight for lunch from the airport. Sangeeta (his wife) will also join us there. Cannot wait to meet you!!!”. 

I said “God is GREAT”.

The reason for sharing this episode is quite apparent. Many times in life, we all face such situations, were our nearet and dearest say, act or behave in manner which leaves us puzzled, dumbfounded and simply confused. We immediately doubt the relationship, the sincerity of the other person. We jump to conclusions without giving the other person a benefit of doubt. In situations like this, it’s important to maintain our calm and not to ‘give back’ and counter the action. Patience is very important in such matters. Reassuring words like ‘Its OK’ really help. We may have all kinds of thoughts emanating in our mind. But DO NOT action them.

P.S. we he had a wild two days, and he went out of the way to make sure I was pampered and well taken care of .

Feature image credit: Inc magazine.