I Was Wrong. The First Chapter of Marcus Aurelius’s Meditations is NOT Boring. by Prahalad Rajkumar

After reading the first two pages of Meditations, I stopped reading the book.

The book seemed like a listicle of people he wanted to thank. That didn’t sound very interesting. If a book can’t captivate me in the first few pages, it is likely to disappoint. I’m better off switching ships to a book that captivates my attention.

There are exceptions to every rule. Yuval Noah Harari’s Sapiens plodded through introductory historic details before blowing my mind away.

Well, my first impression of Meditations was wrong. Very wrong. The first chapter of Meditations, titled “Debts and Lessons” contains life-changing takeaways. I just didn’t have the context to appreciate it when I read it first.

Meditations is one of the most important works of Stoicism. This, however, is not just a book dealing with philosophical gymnastics at an intellectual level. This book contains practical and actionable wisdom on how to live a good life. Marcus Aurelius was a roman emperor, who applied these principles to rule his kingdom. This provides great credibility to these teachings. These are not idle words of any random philosopher. This is actionable advice from a person who held the highest office.

Ryan Holiday, the modern day spokesperson for all things stoic, has referenced Meditations repeatedly in his writings. This is the book that shook Ryan Holiday completely into a new direction (Holiday refers to such books as “quake books”). Has read Meditations over 100 times since then (becoming a “centireader”).

Meditations Was the Personal Diary of Marcus Aurelius, Not Intended for the Public Eye

Meditations was not intended for the public eye. These were personal reflections of Marcus Aurelius. His diary.

Diaries typically contain garbled thoughts of the mind. Not this one. Marcus’s diary contains wisdom more profound than what can be found in a million books. So much so that this has become a manual for the stoic philosophy.

The First Chapter of Meditations is a Manual on How to Practice Gratitude

The first chapter, aptly titled “Debts and Lessons”, is a demonstration of gratitude. While there have been many books and online articles that talk about gratitude, the practitioners remain few.

Gratitude is a muscle that is to be strengthened. With constant practice. Marcus Aurelius teaches the skill of practicing gratitude by way of example.

He is grateful to his grandfather for teaching character and self-control. He is grateful to his father for teaching integrity and manliness. He is grateful to his mother for her inability not only to do wrong but to even think of it. Among other things. And the list goes on.

Marcus Aurelius Demonstrate the Art of Reframing Situations

Life is all about perspective.

One person may choose to see a situation as the worst thing ever. The other person may see the exact same situation as the best thing that happened to him. Marcus chose to reframe his life situations in a positive way.

Marcus mentions how he recognizes the malice, cunning and hypocrisy that power produces, and how “good families” show a peculiar ruthlessness. He does not spend time chastizing or judging the malice or hypocrisy. He focuses on recognizing these artifices, so that he can insulate himself. More importantly, he can refrain from cultivating these vices.

He thanks the Gods that he wasn’t raised by his grandfather’s concubine longer than he was. As opposed to complaining about the time that she raised him.

He thanks the Gods that he wasn’t talented in rhetoric, poetry or other areas. We can be forgiven for seeing this as bizarre. A person surely thanks God for beingtalented in one or more fields? Marcus Aurelius explains his reasoning: “If I’d felt I was making better progress, I might never have given them up.” And Rome would not have had the great king that Marcus Aurelius was. And from our perspective, we wouldn’t have had Stoicism.

There is Something to Learn from Every Person

Nobody would have faulted Marcus if he spent some time complaining or ranting. Isn’t the diary the perfect place for a much-needed rant?

As (a man) thinketh in his heart, so is he.
— Bible, Book of Proverbs 23:7

Marcus Aurelius bled positivity from every pore of his being. And that included his reflections. He chose not to reflect on the shortcomings of people. He instead chose to reflect on the goodness of the people in his life.

As the cliche goes, there is something to learn from every person. For Marcus, this was not a cliche. This was a way of life. He actively embraced this idea. He provides a comprehensive list of the lessons he learned from key people in his circles.

A Sampling of the Lessons Marcus Aurelius Learned

From his first teacher, he learned to put up with discomforts and not to make demands.
From Diognetus, he learned to hear unwelcome truths.
From Appollonius, he learned how to accept favors from friends without losing self-respect or appearing ungrateful.
He learned kindness from Sextus.
From the literary critic Alexander, he learned to answer people’s questions without correcting their grammar.
From Alexander the Platonist, he learned to avoid using the phrase “I’m too busy” (unless that really was the case).
From Catulus, he learned to not disregard a friend’s resentment (even if it was unreasonable), and instead to set the situation right.
From his brother Severus, he learned to not be a pessimist, as well as the virtues of generosity, charity and honesty.From his adopted father, he learned to listen to anybody who could contribute to public good.

Marcus Thanks the Gods For His Children

We take so much for granted.I take my hands for granted. My local vegetable seller, however, does not have his left hand. He struggles to bag my veggies, to give me back change, with every activity that is routine for a person with two hands.

I take my eyes for granted. One of my closest family friends is blind. The act of going to the bathroom and coming back to his chair is a mini-project for him.

Marcus Aurelius does not take things for granted. He offers thanks to the Gods. He offers his thanks that his children were born with good intelligence and without physical deformities.

Reading the account of people whose children are born with unusual conditions is gut-wrenching. Forget the time they have spend in hospitals and with doctors and therapists. The emotional pain suffered by the parents and the children is unimaginable. It should, then, follow that every parent blessed with a child without significant problems should offer infinite thanks to the Gods. As Marcus did.

We Should Write Our Own Version of Debts and Lessons

Most people have spent their time honing the fine art of complaining. I know that I have.

Gratitude is the antidote to complaining. There is good in every person we see. It is our job to recognize this goodness.

As Marcus Aurelius wrote his version of debts and lessons, so must we.

Doing this has multiple benefits:

We train the brain to look for the positive.
When we consciously observe the virtues of others, we develop a liking for them. The converse holds good as well — when we look at their faults, we develop a dislike for them.
Nobody makes it in life on their own. Writing this list is but a small step in recognizing the role of others in shaping our life.
This is a ready reminder of lessons that we can revisit regularly.
Writing this list feels darn good.

The biggest benefit: It is a step forward in leading a good life.

Image Credit: Roger Bradshaw on Unsplash