Bringing you an excerpt from “Think like a Monk” by Jay Shetty… Isn’t it quite often that we expect to be loved back when we love someone? Jay explains this beautifully in “The Circle of Love”
In a community where everyone looked out for each other, I initially expected my care and support for other monks to be returned directly by them, but the reality turned out to be more complex.
During my first year at the ashram, I become upset, and I approach one of my teachers for advice. “I’m upset,” I say. “I feel like I’m giving out a lot of love, but I don’t feel like it’s being returned in kind. I’m loving, caring, and looking out for others, but they don’t do the same for me. I don’t get it.”
The monk asks, “Why are you giving out love?”
I say, “Because it’s who I am.”
The monk says, “So then why expect it back? But also, listen carefully. Whenever you give out any energy- love, hate, anger, kindness- you will always get it back. One way or another. Love is like a circle. Whatever love you give out, it always comes back to you. The problem lies with your expectations. You assume the love you recieve will come from the person you gave it to. But it doesn’t always come from that person. Similarly, there are people who love you who you don’t give the same love in return.”
Isn’t that so true? Too often we love people who don’t love us, and we fail to return the love of others who do.
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