Letter to My Daughter – 2

Exactly a year back, when my daughter Anusha turned 18, I had written a similar letter, which all of you greatly appreciated. So I am sharing the one I wrote to her this year.

Dear Anusha
Happy birthday!

You are out of the Teens!! Terrific for kids and traumatic for parents!!

As I had done when you turned 18, I am sharing some thoughts, so you can be better prepared for what life has in store for you.

1. Own Up – You don’t have to ‘pretend’ that you are taking decisions; you actually DO take those decisions. What courses to take in college, what o have for dinner, the best (and safest) commute to home,etc., YOU ARE making those decisions. So you cannot blame anyone (read parents!) for the same.

2. Grasp Knowledge – all through school, you have been learning; now, you must grasp knowledge from what you learnt. Make your own inferences on what is useful and what is trashy. Be selective in what you retain, as u cannot retain everything.

3. Size up your Balance Sheet– Know what are your assets, and liabilities, strengths and weaknesses. What you can count on, and what needs building up. And these can change. Good looks can be strength one situation and a liability in some other. So be aware.

4. Strength of your advantages and weakness of your Limitations – Success is sometimes not determined by your biggest strength but the tiniest of weaknesses. My brilliance in Spanish cannot save me from angry cavemen in Africa. My running skills cannot help me from drowning. It’s important to be cognizant of such situations.

5. Cannot have it all – Be realistic. Your school friends left you; went to other colleges. Your college friends will also leave you someday. What is left behind are memories. These memories can ensure that the bonds survive decades. So focus on building deep relationships with few, not trying to please everyone all the time.

6. Patience – Average lifespan is 80; you have 75% still ahead of you. You need more stamina for the next 60, so do not burn yourself out. Do not speed things up; let them take their own course. Focus on the action, and leave the rest to God.

7. Observe – More than seeing and listening, focus on Observing. Learn from action, movement, faces and body language. You will learn lot more.

8. Stay close to nature – Beaches and mountains attract more tourists than skyscrapers and casinos because humans are happier in nature. Spend time in the natural environment. I am not saying to become a monk and meditate in the mountains, but when u have a chance, be amidst nature.

9. Health is Wealth – Be obsessed about not losing weight but being fit. Weight can go up and down, but fitness is a constant. As long as you remain fit, it’s easy to lose weight. But just losing weight does not ensure you are fit.

10. Discipline – Have an order or routine in your life; cultivate habits that are easy to repeat and keep you sane.

I cannot help but make this all gyani gas, but it’s essential you have these as ready reckoners for your reading every once a while.

Have a fantastic one!!
love,
Pappa