Misunderstanding – A Failure to Understand

Misunderstanding is a failure to understand something correctly. Misunderstandings are the root of conflict in many relationships. It can range from minor misunderstandings to toxic misunderstandings. They cause stress, frustration, depression, turmoil, and probably the worst perpetrator. 

Misunderstandings occur when there is a lack of effective communication like noise in communication channels, wrong selection of the words and tone used in the written message and arrangement of the message are major causes that lead to misunderstandings between the sender and receiver.

Causes of Misunderstandings:

1.The speaker wrongly interprets reality (sees or hears something which does not correspond to the truth);

2.The speaker tries to express a thought which is unclear to others as well as to him or herself too. 

3.The speaker is unable to express the desirable thought clearly to the others. 

4.The speaker speaks in a low voice, pronounces unclearly or makes a slip of the tongue. 

5.There are disturbances in the modes of communication.

6. The recipient understands the message in different way from that intended by the speaker;

Relationships need time and patience to build trust. A healthy relationship is one where both understand each other’s thoughts, feelings and viewpoint. It is possible only through healthy conversation. However, sometimes, even after trying hard, your partner fails to understand your feelings and what you want to convey and this leads to misunderstandings. Even in some cases, unresolved misunderstandings create bigger conflicts between relationships and may spoil the relationship. Once in a life, you will face a scenario where misunderstandings are built between you and your partner but there are always simple ways to resolve them.

Tips to resolve misunderstandings :

1.Communicate openly : 

If during a conversation with your partner, you didn’t like what your partner said, then stop them right there and ask them what they exactly meant, clear your misunderstandings at that point. Don’t jump to a conclusion right away. Sometimes, you interpret a statement in a negative way while the intention of the other person was not negative. It is better to openly communicate with your partner what bothered you instead of keeping quiet and let it stay in your heart.

2. Make them understand your point:

If you feel you have said something wrong then clear it, rephrase the statement and make the other person understand what you actually meant. Try saying this thing in that situation, ‘I think I came across as wrong but I meant this.’ It’ll help the other person to understand your perspective better and it will also help to clear your misunderstandings. 

3. Avoid texting during a fight:

If you both are facing any conflict, then instead of resolving it on text or on phone, try to meet your partner face-to-face and find a solution. Texting doesn’t let the other person know your tone and emotions, in turn, it leads to increased misunderstanding. Texting harms the relationship, so try to meet the person face to face to resolve the conflict. 

4. Agree to disagree:

If you think you are right and your partner thinks that they are right, then instead of arguing or fighting find a middle ground. It is not important to convince your partner every time, sometimes you have to agree to disagree to their point. 

5. Stay calm and focus on the positive points:

Every relationship has some positive aspects to look through, you should focus on those positive points. If you are feeling that misunderstandings are building up in your relationship, then try to stay calm and look at the positive points of your relationship. If you concentrate on the positive part of the relationship, then you will resolve the conflict and won’t carry it forward.

Hope these tips will help you ❤

          Author – Palak Bedi