Have you ever focused so much on a thought that it has manifested absolutely as it is. And then how did you feel ? Do share in the comment section.
Well, let me share my experience here.
My mom and dad were supposed to visit me early this September, after almost an year. I was super excited and had made so many plans. I was focusing on these plans for more than 2 months.
Meeting my parents was an emotional moment for me, as I had almost lost my Dad in the second wave of Covid, but Swami ji’s grace saved him.
Finally my parents arrived and we all were hugging and crying like characters of Suraj Barjatya films.
Well everything was going fine until the 4th day of their arrival.
I developed severe pelvic pain which continued for almost 5 days. I am not a medicine lover so I didn’t take any over the counter medicine that was offered to me by my mother. (She is a mini walking chemist shop; having all kinds of allopathic, ayurvedic and homeopathic medicines)
Well on the sixth night of my pain, I felt strong chills in the body and next morning I was down with a fever of 102.0 F.
Like a good girl, who wants to be in harmony with nature, I decided to skip my meals and give rest to my body so that it can heal on its own.
That was such a big blunder I made as by the same evening I fainted and my blood pressure had gone down to 80/50.
(Where I live it is impossible to get a doctor during the daytime, until we drive for almost 20 kms, and I fainted around 8.30 pm)
My family was obviously worried and in a dilemma about what to do. They tried all the home remedies and with grace I became conscious. Fortunately within 20 minutes my BP was normal too.
But same night my fever became severe and, though I have decided not to bother Swami ji for anything that happens in my life, I messaged Dipti ji to include my name in the prayers list, as my daughter got frightened due to my health condition.
(Some kind co devotees approached me personally and checked upon me till I actually recovered. Sincere thanks to Peeush Ji, Jasmine OM and Meenakshi Singhal ji for their compassion.)
Finally I fell super sick and had to consult a doctor in Delhi, as here in Bhimtal doctors could not diagnose me properly.
I had a fever, body ache, chills, dizziness, enlarged lymph nodes under my ear, itchy and painful throat and absolutely no strength in my body.
I was then put on antibiotics. According to the doctor, I had a viral attack followed by bacterial infection. Fortunately covid was ruled out.
With grace, within 15 days I recovered with reduced stamina.
The reason why I am telling all of this is that, somewhere I feel that what I had planned for the coming few days turned out the opposite of my expectations.
With too much excitement I felt I only attracted things for which I was not prepared for.
These were the plans I had and the outcomes I got:
- I will be in bed whole day taking rest as my parents will manage my daughter. (Literally I was in bed for 5 days, except getting up to use the washroom and they managed everything)
- I will work out every day as I haven’t fallen sick for almost 3 years. I used to boast about it to my family that, there is not even a single time that I have caught the common cold or flu (except genetic knee pain and from being a bit overweight, which I am) (I didn’t work out for 20 days at a stretch and even after that my mom kept a hawk’s eye on me whenever I exceeded 15 mins of light cardio)
- Will give foot massage to my parents. (I got lots of foot and body massages due to all the aches I had)
- Will eat healthy and home cooked food only. (I was forced to eat home cooked food only and that too simple bland food. No special kadhi or paneer dish prepared by my mom)
- I will cook all my specialties for my parents. (Fortunately I did that before I fell sick. For the rest of the dishes, they had to wait.)
- Will take them around for sightseeing and have fun. (I was left at home and my husband took them out for that and of course without me they didn’t have the kind of fun they had expected)
- Will sleep peacefully because when my parents are around, I feel quite relaxed. (I could not sleep at a stretch for more than 15 minutes for three consecutive days, which further affected my health adversely)
Well this whole incident taught me that we should be cautious with our thoughts, especially when we are alone and thinking about ourselves.
Also we should not boast about something. God has many plans to shatter our ego when we feel proud of something.
The only good thing that happened in this whole incident, except realising that family loves us conditionally, I was mindful.
Few moments before I fainted that night, I was very dizzy, grasping for breath, restless and heavily sweating. I could see my daughter, mom, dad and husband in front of my blurred vision before I fell down on the floor.
I thought this is going to be my last moment. I didn’t feel any emotions or attachment with any of them, except for my husband.
But I was mindful and quickly shifted my focus to my Guru and lord and started chanting his name that if I am dying I should have HIS thought and remembrance only.
Now when I am on path of recovery, I feel amazing knowing that HE has made me so mindful subconsciously that even in adverse situation I can still surrender and remember him.
This is such a disconnected post but I felt like sharing with my OS family.
Jai Sri Hari
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