Spirituality and Sexuality Continuing……..

Picture attached is the floral clock at Niagara Falls, Ontario.

Meanwhile, I got some sweet moments to share with you. While in India I had the opportunity to visit Shree Badrika Ashram. Whole place is brimming with Om Swami signature style, “A heart  beating with compassion and spilling happiness.” As I arrived at the front office, a cute little kitty was blocking the tiny set of stairs leading to the office. She was basking in the warmth of the early afternoon sun on a lazy winter day. As I approached her she lifted her head with promptness and alertness. After a brief but thorough scrutiny of her privacy breech, she put her head back, where it was and returned to her afternoon siesta after rolling back and forth on her back and her belly a few times. Alternating between throwing her fours in the air and her tail as she moved back and forth. Then passed off into a sweet slumber.
As I watched her, I thought Navjot you gotta do this too. Forget everything else for now! This is exactly what I did for the next three days. I did stick my fours up in the air to see how it felt, it actually felt good! Now I was missing the tail, but I did stick my tail bone up in the air and tucked my belly in between my chest and legs to complete the experience – now this is called the Balasana and Anand Balasana in yoga. I just didn’t get to bask outside in the sunlight and roll back and forth on my back and belly! I didn’t want to scandalize the folks there!
I was so impressed with my friend the kitty, next day as I was at the door to the dining room, my friend kitty showed up to the door. She gave me an imploring look to enter the dining room with me. Of course I was all happy and full of gratitude for the powerful learning that she bestowed on me, I opened the door for her. No sooner did I do that, I heard, No! Don’t let her in! I heard a woman’s voice. Too late, I had already let her in. Once inside, she promptly scampered to the other end of the room and gave a little bit of a run around to the woman who was trying implore her to go out with her. Finally she did leave with a little bit of an attitude while exiting! I looked back at her, “Look I did what I could for you, you didn’t carry it of off well, not my fault. My friend you got a reputation around this place and you got to fix it before you’re allowed in here”
Swamiji! Gonna be super impressed with me. Look, I graduated from bee’s and beetle’s to Cats now!
Once I was telling my brother how I got distanced from my friends. My life was a struggle at each step and I did not want to bring this energy to them so I stayed away from them. We were having a light hearted chat, he said playfully you should say this to them in Guru Dutt style. I said Ok will do! I am so not a person who would ever say this to anyone!
Hum gham-zada hain laen kahan se khushi ke geet,
(I am sad I can’t sing songs of happiness)
Denge wohi jo payenge is zindagi se ham.
(I will give what I have received from life)
The above is couplet from the classic Bollywood movie Pyaasa! And long time ago when I watched this movie, I just ended up crying until I could cry no more. I know this is terrible but I cry in a movie! Somehow it feels good to cry in the moment. Often I get consoled by people, “It’s a movie, it’s not real.” I think, “Really, this is not real.” Of course sex trade is real, and of course the plight of these women who exist at the bottom of the barrel is real.” We have failed them as a society. We have been a failure in creating a safe and respectful existence for all our mother’s, sister’s and daughter’s in the community. It is a shame on the community where a woman in the community is forced to trade flesh for food and shelter. No community member can raise their head in pride until every woman seeking a safe and dignified existence can find one in the community. It happens in every country, just in a different context. Yet another very powerful expression of sexuality.
One day I was doing a home visit for a young teen mother. I said to her aren’t you going to breast feed your baby? As I saw her stick a bottle into the baby’s little pout. She said, “No I can’t, I got to get back to work.” “Back to work? Like this! I knew she was a sex worker and she had just had a Cesarean section a week ago! Oh! Not now in a couple weeks. A couple week are you sure, you can’t even stand up straight right now. Don’t worry Miss! She gonna be fine! I gonna take care of this little peanut here, while she’s gone. Her mother interjected sternly, someone’s got to keep the kitchen fires burning! I left that visit feeling numb, resuming sexual activity three weeks after a C-section is so painful and lot of times women take a few months to get to it. I had a Cesarean section and I didn’t want anyone near me for next six months!
Of course, these women have to keep their plight hidden from the men they serve. They have to look very attractive and happy in their company, to sell themselves. Men who receive these services are unaware of the energy the woman is actually is bringing to them. Guy’s wake up, why are you indulging in something you would not like to bring upon your own sisters and daughters. What you give to the universe returns to you!
Community is well aware of the plight of most of these women engaging in sex trade. Yet it is flourishing business! Select few women who are very sexual will enjoy the profession and that’s ok if this is a matter of personal choice. But most are forced into it for one or the other reason. Most of these women are destitute.
Real indicator of the progress and evolution of the community, is How empowered do the most vulnerable members in the community feel? As long as forced prostitution exists in a community it is even useless to talk of progress based on calculations like gross domestic product (GDP) per capita, sitting in plush meeting rooms. Well! Its patriarchal systems that are in place since times immemorial, it’s a man’s world. Hence women’s interests are underrepresented in every community! Right from disparity in income for same work to a right to a respectful existence.
I have made it a point in my work life that no matter who I see, specifically someone who is under privileged or undermined. I offer them respect, a non-judgmental space and undivided attention to say what they want to express. I will try to accommodate anyone and everyone who shows up to my doorstep.
Once, I had a couple where the wife was not English speaking and she was from Serbia and the husband was translating. At some point, as I faced her and was talking to her she responded to me with an English word. Husband said this is the first time my wife has attempted to talk in English. It made me very happy that I had succeeded in what I set out to do, provide empowerment. This is the essence of a positive space and empowerment that people will feel comfortable and enabled to do what they want to do.
Anytime a man abuses, undermines or shows down a woman in his life or the community. His daughter learns, what to expect from men in the community and learns how to accept abuse and disrespect from society. We know what this means, she loses confidence to stand up for herself and her self-esteem suffers. A mindful and responsible father makes an empowered daughter!
While I was researching this article, I came across a commentary on Tantra by someone. It finally highlighted another aspect of spirituality and sexuality.
I am not surprised that somewhere in the innate body intelligence spiritual energy and sexual energies are identified as one and the same. Sexual energy is a representation of that core universal energy that powers the body. And sexual activity is associated with transmission of the divine energy in form of vital life force. In a thus conditioned body the movement of the vital life force is identified with sexual activity and stimulation.

There is probably another explanation for this. In order to ensure its own movement and propagation, sexual energy is an integral part of the vital life force to ensure that it keeps moving and promoting itself through physical bodies. Hence, when the divine energy is invoked. It comes with this integrated sexual component. So when a yogi acquires powers after invoking a divine energy, apparently enhanced sexual power is a part of that power.

In order to ensure that the divine energy is invoked by the individuals in a way that is most conducive to the welfare of the community. Yoga has an inbuilt system to treat all physical desires as vices and abstention is practiced from the very beginning. Whereas Tantra considers physical desires as natural and a gift from the divine. Tantra aspires to understand the difference between just satisfying these desires at a physical level as a vice and lifting this sexual desire to a metaphysical plane to achieve cosmic union of Prakriti and Purusha.

The last part next week, stay tuned……….