Spirituality and Sexuality

The picture you see with this post is the Niagara Falls. It is one of the wonders of the world. I clicked it a few weeks ago, when I visited Niagara. I do it every summer, except for the Covid summers. I find it absolutely fascinating, how this sheet of water falls over the edge of the rocks generating so much energy and power. It sends vibrations into the surrounding area. Not to forget the gentle mist that falls on your face as you walk by the falls. Reminds me of the tremendous energy and power of the universe, and a tiny little me in this big schema of things. Here’s the divine in its most powerful and gentle forms residing together in the same place. We are going to nose dive into this post, talking about yet another commendable energy in the universe. That has a very profound effect on human psyche and body.

This is a real and sweet little interaction from one of my work days. I switched it up to capture the essence without compromising privacy. One day as I was doing clinic, I was scheduled to see a mom and a newborn baby duo. As I greeted the mother with the baby, I noticed a young girl accompanying them. I asked the mother, who do we have here today? The little girl translated this to the woman and the woman said “My daughter Tina.” Meanwhile as the mother got busy with undressing the baby for the exam. Little Tina came and stood beside me and said “Can I translate for my mother.” Cutest little kiddo, she stood with her tummy tucked forward and her face exuding innocence. She reminded me of myself as a little girl. I was a chubby little girl with a round face and a ponytail on my head just like her. I lived through a childhood full of cheeks getting pulled and kissed and people wondered at my innocence.

As I turned my chair to face her. I said “Of course you can, I will not call the interpreter.” As I said this Tina promptly perched herself on a chair opposite myself.

She looked around my room and took in the energy in the room. “I like the paintings in your room, did you make them.” “Aww! thank you Tina, I love painting and I made them.” “They look very good.” “Thank you!” I marveled at this kid’s observation and eloquence at probably six or maybe seven year’s. I don’t get this kind of interaction even with the adults. Child was very eloquent unlike myself. I was a very shy kid, it took me a really long time to learn to greet people. As a little kid I would lock myself in the room and start crying when some someone came to visit us. Leave alone eye contact and conversation, I did not even want to be in that room. I would ask my parents, when will they go? Out of embarrassment my parents stopped asking me to come meet other people until I got over my habit and learnt how to greet people. It is a different story altogether now, I don’t care anymore. I love talking to people now!

Whenever I have siblings in the appointment, I try to involve them in the appointment. In between her translation for her mother. I asked her, “Have you been helping your mom with the baby.” “Oh Yes, when my mother and father went to the hospital to birth the baby. I took care of my sister’s and my aunt took good care of me and my sister’s, while my parents were in the hospital.” “Oh that’s very nice of you.”

As I was examining her baby brother, who had been undressed by the mother for the exam. Her mother asked Tina to hand her something from the stroller. As she came to hand a diaper to her mother, she briefly saw her baby brother undressed and she quickly blocked her vision with her hand and went back to the chair, looking all very distressed. I looked at her puzzled. She looked at me innocently and locked her hands in front of her pubic area and said,” You know he has that boy thing down there, all boys got to have one. My dad has one too!” “Oh Yes of course I know he has a boy thing down there.” I said to her empathizing with her. And daddy has it too! I thought empathizing with the couple! He made the four of you and still going strong. Mummy’s talking contraception now. Big boy gotta take it easy, coz’ mummy no more wanna have babies. This is the reality of most couples today. The memory of the moment tickles me even today. Research says that >99% of sexually experienced women in US have used contraception at some point in their life. At a very young age of 31/2 years to 4 years children start to identify their sexuality and start noticing a difference between the girls and boys.

Sexuality is core to every physical body that exists, it gives identity to an individual a man or a woman. Recently, we had a baby born with ambiguous genitalia. And because as clinical providers we are so accustomed to saying, “It’s a girl!” or “It’s a boy!” the midwife who described this said she did not know what to say and she felt bad about it. She brought the discussion to table and educated the community of midwives. Midwifery community believes in empowerment of women and families. So every attempt is made to make pregnancy and birth a positive experience. She also sought help from the experts from the transgender community and they helped. So that issue could be discussed with the parents positively, to empower them to accept this reality and work with it.

After a bunch of consultations with the specialists, the parents were eventually, advised to raise the child with neutral gender until the child was able to identify with one. Then would come a battery of surgeries to assign a gender. Today we have companies like Hollister, they host neutral gender clothing line along with men and women, to provide inclusivity. Raising awareness of such issues will improve the sensitivity of the community members towards issues afflicting these vulnerable members of the community. Hence creating a respectful and inclusive environment for these members. Here is another opportunity for a random act of kindness!

This is a very special post and I have been building on this post for a long time now. It was in some way inspired by the divine mother. Here is why I say this. I was watching some youtube video of Swamiji, which someone had quoted in their post. I came across another YouTube video where Swamiji is answering a question on sexual thoughts in meditation. Being a healthcare provider with focus on sexual health, I was curious how spirituality views sexuality. I saw a bunch of expressions in the comments as well. It was interesting to see them too.

Next day, as I sat meditating, this thought stayed with me and interfered with my concentration until I decided that I will explore this thought. Then I was allowed to refocus on my meditation. I was meditating on the second of the nine forms of mother divine Devi Brahmcharini. Whenever the universe draws my attention to something it is for a reason, this is my faith and this is my belief. Here is what I discovered when I researched this concept. Here, I am sharing it with you.

Hang tight we’ll go to the second part very soon……….