When You Can Neither Push Back nor Explain!

I dont want to make os.me.a Kahani ghar ghar kee and saas bahoo saga serial ,but there are some unresolved incident may be which need healing that I want to share with the community and seek their advice and suggestions on mindful speech ,behavior and conduct so that in future if either of us is confronted with similar situations we are well prepared aswelll those who brood on past misbehavior mistreatment or feeling of being wronged, exploited or bullied too can express themselves and get rid of the unknown baggage on their concious! There are certain relationships where out of respect or scare of family withering apart or humility or even conditioning or tallerance ,where you dont accept the other person’s behaviour, comments ,interference or bullying but out of politeness or scare of unpleasant circumstances you just keep silent but your mind doesn’t remain quiet and keeps cursing, accusing or making u feel guilty of your covardice and chicken heart ! Among many one such incident i do remember is when my marriage was 6 years old and my sister in law was expecting her first child and my inlaws that s her parents had come to our city to take care of her .We all live in nuclear families due to work in different cities!That time during a restaurant visit when all of us were waiting for dinner a discussion on who will take care of my father in law during his cataract operation was in progress! Since he wanted to get it done in his home town and my mother in law would be with my sister in law ,the only option to assist him was me as my brother in law and husband would be having there work schedules ,but my daughter too had a regular school as well we too lived in a nuclear family with part timer maids with no fixed timing ,as well during the discussion my husband was not present , so when they asked me would i accompany my father in law for 15 days to his home town ,i said If my husband has no objection i ll definitely go with Papaji. I think i was most humble and duty ful but this statement made my sister in law furious and she said u were not respectful and dint agree to our proposal immideately! My inlaws joined her and later conveyed same thing in twisted form to my husband who scolded me to be rough and rude! No one wanted to buy my explanations and logic! Any ways i still smilingly serve them and they still take out things which still bother me because of my Ego! My question to community is when u cant push back then do u do it as Tapppas to keep forgiving and being compassionate towards those who are not that concious, evolved or mindful with their words and behaviors??